‘A little bit closer, a bit lighter, change your angle, pout, twist your leg, put the left one forward. This picture is the bomb‘.
‘You look really lovely today, let me take your picture. Can I hold your items for you so that your pictures can look really good’.
‘Femi, how are you today? Just thought to check up on you.’
She is always the liveliest in the room, always the one with the right words. She laughs her heart out. She is the one who’s willing to help out but here they are standing over the her grave site. What happened to Anita?
How can Anita be depressed? This was the predominant question in the room, how can Anita be depressed? She’s money, she works with a very good company, she laughs a lot, she doesn’t even look like a girl with any care in this world? How?
The last conversation we had, she sounded really good; her bestie mentioned to a friend. she didn’t tell me she’s going through anything. She sounded really really good, she sounded too good. Sharon, Anita’s bestie kept resounding those words like a child in the nursery reciting their rhymes. What could have gone wrong? Anita swallowed insecticide? why? what could have happened? She was with family a day before and still went ahead? Obviously, the ever bubbling one was holding a lot in her heart but her laughter looked like she had so much light to give her world.
Oh, she left us a note, her devastated brother announced.
And with tears, sighs, regrets, they looked up to him as he unfolded the note, cleared this throat in grief to read his younger sister’s death note.
‘Dear Family, Friends,
I am not sure I can cope with staying on earth anymore. I feel like a failure. I am not sure what is happening to me? I have tried to talk but no one sees nor listens. No one sees the signs. I am in this dark space; my job no longer gives me joy. My heart is just heavy. I wish I could take this grip away but I am sorry, I feel like dying so that I can be at peace. My world is shattered. No one asks Anita, are you fine?
I keep checking on you all. I am empty. There is a void in my life that no one can fill. The nightmares, the thoughts, the dark clouds. I am tired of everything. Do I love you all? Of course, I do. I really need this rest and it all ends here’.
In deep pain, her brother screamed alongside everyone in the room. There’s this guilt they couldn’t explain. If only someone had asked. If only they had taken away assumptions. If only they had responded to her text, if only they had taken the phone away from her and asked her to be photographed. Alas, they realized that Anita was that photographer who never got photographed. A little more could have helped but what do we know? We were too busy, we all have our problems and just because we think people are good doesn’t make them good! Lesson learnt?
A call, A talk, A text…
The ones that laugh a lot, the ones that look like they have it all put together are usually the ones in need of extra thoughts. Send that message, make that call, don’t be deceived by the WhatsApp memes and cruise. Show your friends a little extra… Just a little extra could have saved the day.
Sometimes we cannot explain, but we can also pray for our friends.
Written by Onozasie